So apparently I have a reputation or something as a Raffles fan because friend-who-shall-remain-nameless-for-his-own-good, after briefly discussing something to do with said Victorian crime capers, proceeds to tell me about this £37,000 crown that’s currently in town, its exact location, how very easy it would be to (hypothetically) steal it, give great detail as to how one would (hypothetically) go about this, and how hilarious it would be if someone did (which it would be, for reasons I cannot specify without saying where it is).
Mate, I want a summer holiday as much you do. But. There’s fandom and there’s fandom, man.
Also it’s too big to fit under a top hat.
Its a date bb. I’ll bring a disguise.
Yes but what’s the enamelling like?
Enamelling abysmal, D-minus, v poor show. Not wanted for anyone’s mantelpiece. Also not worthy of Tesco Value custard creams never mind Huntley & Palmers.
sometimes i laugh because yeah, the winchesters stopped the apocalypse, but it took them like a year and ten deaths of close friends and family to do it, but an angel and a demon did it like fifteen years earlier in literally a week and the demon used a tyre iron in the final big fight and then angel was only in because there wouldn’t be any sushi in heaven this is why everyone should read good omens goodbye.
Let’s also keep in mind the fact that the angel lost his body, had to possess an old lady, accidentally burned his bookshop down and took a damn scooter to the site of the end of the world
while the demon was the one who lost the Antichrist in the first place, never actually found him again, nearly got killed by his bosses, and accidentally lit his car on fire
and both of them had to ask for directions and barely showed up on time to do anything useful except stand up to The Dark Lord Satan
and despite the fact that these idiots (whom I love with all my heart) barely have their shit together they still did a better job than the Winchesters.
And in the process of all this the angel managed to end up in the body of an evangelistic minister on TV and proceeded to tell him Heaven only had a “fifty percent chance of coming out on top” so he “might as well send money to a Satanist hot line to cover your bets”.
The demon’s other weapon, aside from the fearsome tire iron, was a Sainsbury’s plant mister.
And still they managed to do it without anyone (except a dove) dying. And the dove was the angel’s fault. He was trying to do a magic trick. The demon brought it back to life.
Still better than the Winchesters.