My Anime Reviews: Howls Moving Castle
Someone needs to staple this dude’s castle into the ground and start taxing the fuck out him.
So Human!Impala is a pretty popular fan-art/fic/photoset/related derivative concept in the Supernatural fandom. That’s cool, I respect it, it would be an awesome awesome thing to have happen.
Except, why are almost all of the headcanons I see of really young, kinda skinny, flirty and attractive people with maybe some cute tattoos of “SW/DW” or “KAZ2Y5” to make them edgier…
It’s not that I have a problem with those, exactly, but ’Baby’ or not, this is the Impala we are talking about.
She’s not some flashy new sports-car. She’s an 47 year old muscle car that’s been rebuilt from the ground up at least once, and patched and fixed and hammered a billion other times. She’s a big, long, four-door car, a tough car that’s survived possessions and car accidents that killed her passengers and wear and tear that would put most cars rusting in the scrap heap years ago. She’s been left behind and put in storage, and was missed every time. She’s got graffiti and toys, she’s got weapons in her false trunk, and a engine that rumbles under the weight of the countless miles she’s put behind her, and she’s been the closest thing to a home the boys have for most of their life. She’s a car that is safety, and nurturing, and love, just as much as she is a car that, to quote Kripke, “when people stop next to it at the lights, they lock their doors.”
If you are going to give me a Human!Impala, don’t give me a sexy babe in a leather jacket (of either gender).
Give me someone who has crows-feet, who has scars and knife marks and a twice broken nose and a bit of grey in their hair. Give me someone who doesn’t give a damn about being sexy unless it gets the job done. Give me someone a scared four year old could curl up next to and feel safe. Give me someone who is tall and broad shouldered and has arms that could carry the world. Give me someone who could beat the crap out of you, and cook you a filling meal, and maybe do both in the same breath, to different people. Give me eyes and a mouth that don’t wink and smirk, just look a little tired and fierce. Give me someone with a Midwest accent and a take-no-shit attitude who sings snatches of Led Zeppelin under their breath, who gives comfort and will give you hell….
Someone that means what the Impala means to the boys, you know?